100 Bucks

I mentioned last month that Fanella Fielding was one of my favorite people and always will be... but I have a lot of  people on my favorite people list...one of  them is my friend Buck... I wrote about Buck previously in that we travelled together to Greece quite often... fact of the matter is because of Buck I know my way around Morocco, Cairo and Amsterdam and because of him I once sailed on the QE2 and met Carly Simon for the second time... I don't think I made as indelible impression on her as she did me the first time... but I think it might have something to do with the fact that at the time she was dating Al Corley (after he left Dynasty).

Although I don't know any of the intimate details of their life and eventual breakup... I have it on good authority that it was much more than not wanting to be Carly Corley.

My Friend Buck was one in a million...but I digress because  today I'm not writing about Buck... but actually the denomination of $100.00---

One hundred dollars has for me and almost everyone I have ever known to be the magical and coveted bill folded into birthday, X-mas, and Bar Mitzvah cards... it always carried a lot of clout with me growing up. The first time I ever had an actual conversation about it was leaving the Olympic Games in Lake Placid in 1980... my friends and I were driving away discussing how far  one hundred dollars did not go at The Olympics as far as event tickets and food and entertainment.... so we passed the drive time discussing what $100 was worth at different times in our lives... when I was old enough to start spending money in larger amounts it would buy a good ski parka... or a weekend of skiing including lift tickets and meals... these days it can still buy a pretty fabulous lunch for two in NYC and you can really get more bang for your 100 bucks if you know when and where to shop. The fact of the matter is with everyone on television saying how great the economy is... I don't think  the economy should be measured on how many billionaires there are but by how many who are struggling to get by... with all of this it has reminded me that even though one hundred dollars does not go as far as it once did... I'm still equally delighted to find one folded in a card as I was when I was young.

I'm making it short and sweet this week and because I have much more going on than I can handle right now and I really can't do justice here dealing with everything else so I'll be taking my holiday break early this year and will return in 2019!

I would like to say an extra special thank you to everyone who reads my blog regularly...

Thank you  all and have a joyous holiday and a happy new year! 

Cheers!

Say Cheese!

I'm going to pull a few loose threads together from the last segment before I go on this week... in terms of what we can find to buy second hand I mentioned I have had the most luck with books ... I now have to include media especially CD's!  A big portion of my re-purchasing history has involved buying cassette tapes to replace albums... and then CD's to replace cassette tapes... (don't even get me started that now vinyl albums are making a comeback)... so I've found most of what I wanted to replace but a few important previously owned albums are still  missing... after years of looking for Stephen Bishop's "Careless" (Probably one of my favorite albums of the 20th century) I finally broke down and ordered the remastered in Japan CD from Amazon... for a whopping fifty something dollars plus tax and shipping... Probably one of my favorite songs written by Janis Ian is 'Stars' she recorded it on an album of the same name in the mid 70's and Barbara Cook recored it on the album 'As of Today' in the late 70's! I have the Barbara Cook CD... but alas the Janis Ian replacement has been elusive... I finally went to look for it at Amazon...

OK that is not happening... the day that you hear that I spent close to $1,000.00 for a used or even a new CD is the day that you can be 100% certain you have been pulled through a portal into a parallel dimension... OK I know I'm a little old fashioned because I don't want unlimited streaming I want to actually own the CD in the same way I want to own a book and not download it on a device... well I'm glad I held out because I found it at one of my second hand haunts for... are you sitting down?... $2.00!... and that  is what patience, faith and determination get you when you shop second hand.

What I really wanted to impart with all of this is that I mentioned that we donate things that we no longer need or want and hope that someone else will appreciate them... but It got me thinking about the people and situations and experiences we discard because they no longer suit us for one reason or another... I wrote in another segment that sometimes people and places are for a finite period that we may share and or learn some important life lesson or simply be an inspiration or help each other in one of the most simple ways in just being a friend... and we have to move on eventually... but the important friendships and relationships endure even if separated by miles, years or death... the others fade because perhaps it becomes too difficult to continue a friendship for a multitude of reasons... The majority of the people that I don't have room in my life anymore are simply because they are not nice people in that they have evolved to be morally and ethically bankrupt... in all the ways possible from greed and selfishness to just being "mean"... on the flip side of this  there are people that for one reason or another we have simply slipped away from each other for no other apparent reason than we went in different directions and we were not able to find the common ground we once shared... in close examination of some of the other people and those issues it has boiled down to...

So there it is... sometimes we simply grow apart from people so we can grow and become who we are supposed to be and who we are supposed to be with... and we have to leave them behind.

I've been listening to Barbara Cook and Janis Ian and going through old photographs and post cards...  I love music because it is like a time machine in that it can take you back to a place that maybe you forgot about in your heart;  it is sometimes important to reconnect to  a person and/or place even briefly and by doing so bringing something back of who you once were to who you are now and what you have become because of it... while looking through old photos I recalled how many times the person pointing the camera  said "Say Cheese!" and in one of them I remember at a party saying "Fromage" as I had recently returned from France... and it reminded me of all the collective memories  we save and the photographs tied with ribbons in boxes that it's important to save what is important and suits you  or will serve you well and get rid of the negative and anything else that may be holding you back from happiness and living your very best one and only life.

All that aside ... one of my very favorite things in life is.... Cheese! No matter where I go in my travels if there is a place that makes cheese I'm there and I want to sample it...

I've written many segments here about  my travels around the world but I would be remiss if not including that almost all of them have involved eating and enjoying local cheese. If you ever have a chance to visit a cheese maker and take a tour I can't recommend it highly enough... But the basics are that cheese is made from coagulated milk and separating gradually  the solid constituents of milk from from the water that they are dissolved in... the solid parts still contain water and the liquid the whey... in modern cheese making the raw milk is subjected to mechanical purification and pasteurized by heat and cooled and ripened and then clotted with acids and heat; the smaller the curds you get the firmer the cheese will be... they are then separated and cut, salted and pressed and repressed and ripened and packaged. You classify cheese by water content% in the fat-free cheese matter--- Extra-hard cheese has less than 51% water, Hard cheese has 49%-56%, Semi-hard cheese has 54%-63%, Semi-soft cheese has 61%-69% and Soft cheese has over 67% water. There is so much more involved in cheese making... but this is the basic gist of it!

I love to cook with cheese but like everything else in life... too much of a good thing is not so great for you so I practice moderation... but when you induldge you can include it in almost everything from bread to dessert. My favorite ways to enjoy cheese are in a souffle or in a quiche or with pasta... or simply sliced with fresh fruit. 

Here is my simple and easy quiche recipe...

For the crust

1 3/4 cup flour

1/2 cup butter cut into small pieces

1 egg yolk

1 pinch of salt

about 1/4 cup cold water

Put the flour and salt in the bowl of a food processor and add the butter and blitz until it is sandy and add the egg yolk and blitz a few times and add slowly through the feed tube the cold water until it forms a ball and process for about 15 seconds and remove and form into a disc and flatten and refrigerate for about an hour wrapped in wax paper.

The filling is where you can be creative ... typically I use

1 medium onion finely chopped sauteed in 2 tablespoons butter and add about a cup of finely chopped mushrooms and cook until wilted  (set aside) For the meat I use about a cup of finely chopped bacon cooked slightly or a cup of finely chopped ham and if I have it on hand chopped chicken or turkey. Mix your meat with the onion and mushrooms and set aside.

Meanwhile roll out your crust  on a floured surface and place it in an ungreased fluted tart pan with a removable bottom. Add the meat mixture and top with 2 heaping cups of Gruyere or Swiss cheese.

In a mixing bowl add the yolks of two eggs and 1 cup Half & Half and 2 tablespoons flour and whisk. In a separate bowl beat the two egg whites until foamy and mix gently with the milk mixture  and pour over the cheese evenly add salt and pepper to take (I usually sprinkle with paprika too) and bake in a 400 degree oven for about a half hour or until it's golden brown. 

(I've made this with seafood like shrimp, and lobster or crab but then I use about a cup of Gruyere and a cup of Fontina)

I think that too often in todays world we forget about the importance of a kind word or an honest compliment, a smile or a caring touch that has the potential to change how your day is going or the potential to help turn someone else's life around.

See you in two weeks and  remember this...

Thank you!

Deja Vu... All Over Again

dé·jà vu/ˌdāZHä ˈvo͞o/

noun a feeling of having already experienced the present situation.

We are really lucky to live in a time when almost anything we want (within reason) is available to us (don't kid yourself in thinking this will last forever; simple supply and demand principles tell us the world can't keep consuming at increasing rates with decreasing supply levels)  for the present if we are willing and able to pay the price for certain things we can have almost anything we want... but keep in the back of your mind that certain things are no longer available and never will be most likely... I said in my first fashion installment to recycle because something you don't want will be a treasure to someone else... when I was younger I would always ashew the idea of visiting second hand stores because I always had more of a feeling for new and fresh and not pre-worn... but a friend of mine in London introduced me to the "Jumble Sales" often in church basements and she explained that wearing vintage is a way of bringing the past into the present and even into the future and enabling certain designs and designers  a new life... but I'll get back to her later...




It's important to understand that clothing and accessories up until the early 1980's is what is considered vintage and anything after that is second hand gently (and sometimes not so gently) worn. I really never embraced second hand shopping until my friend introduced it to me in London and my other (or better) half and I started visiting the shops in New York City. A few of the good stores that I liked are gone because of rising rents and overhead and what not... but a hand full of nice stores still remain. I don't visit Goodwill and Salvation Army for personal reasons... but in New York there is an organization called Housing Works that gives back and provides for the LGBT community and those with HIV Aids virus in many ways including meals, health care and counseling and career options... and they are usually our first stop when we make the rounds visiting the second hand stores... they are also where we donate anything that no longer suits us or is useful.




To tell you the truth there is nothing that either one of us need and we both have enough clothing to last the rest of our lives (with proper care)... but our dishes, and stemware  are both discontinued and we have found replacement pieces at a fraction of the cost of what they would be buying from and on-line replacement service. I've also been fairly lucky with books (ones that I've owned that have been lost or ruined).. and a couple of rare books that I've been lucky enough to find for pennies on the dollar rather than going through  Amazon or Libris on line. There are some people who often make the rounds in the same shops we do who sell vintage or designer goods  and books on line and we have met a hand full of delightful people especially our friend... I'll call her Laura because that is her name.




A few of the things I'm hoping to find are...



Penthuere vase by Renee Lalique



Grass Green Columbian Emerald



Turquoise Squash Blossom 




I actually owned this in the 70's and I would love to have it again... that's the deja vu all over again for me!






Diamond & Gold Pine Cone

This brooch would bring a wan smile to my lips as I think it would be fabulous on my lapel during the winter holidays and a beautiful object the rest of the year... as far as anything else... well I have found brand new never worn clothing with the tickets still attached and I replaced my Courreges and Pucci shirts. I've also found bolts of sumptuous fabric, patterns and sewing supplies and kitchen gadgets (one of my many weaknesses)... but in addition to finding a treasure now and then it's also a stroll down memory lane... because I've seen furniture I grew up with and dishes and nick- knacks I had in college... and even some of the clothing I've worn over the years most of this I don't want to own or wear again but it's nice to revisit a time and place in my mind when I did.




Also don't be fooled into thinking that you are always going to find a bargain... most of the stores do a little research on items and check on-line resale pricing for a guideline... but once in a blue moon something falls through the cracks and you get the deal of a lifetime... We once found in a book we bought original artwork by someone who is exhibited at The Metropolitan Museum of Art... We have really simple rules about buying anything; we only buy what we love and want to use... We have walked away from things we know are worth a great deal in resale but we'll leave that to the people who operate an  on-line or re-sale business; or to someone who loves it and wants to have it as part of their life. In addition to the nice people we see regularly I've met and had charming and unexpected conversations with Toni Tennille, Faye Dunaway and Rene Taylor just to name a few... One of the things you always need to consider is that some of the items are things that came from someone who had died and it is always important to remember that the mementos and other belongings that built precious memories in their life can contribute to someone else's... and from that they have a new life instead of simply being discarded.




If you are lucky enough to have love and real friendship and health you have the most important things in life that money can't buy so the rest of the stuff we have and enjoy and think it important is simply the icing on the cake... my friend who was and will always be one of my favorite people in the world is the person who introduced me to the jumble sales in London... because of her I learned about fine fabric and details and designers like Mariano Fortuny, Edward Molyneaux, Elsa Schiaperelli and Cristobal Balenciaga... none of these are you likely to find in a modern day second hand store or even at a jumble sale (but hey you never know) ... but she did and she showed them to me and we turned them inside out to see the details and we worked together doing research on different designers and items...but more than anything she taught me to laugh and have fun during difficult times... and she told me once "I have lived through every bad day of my life" I always think of her whenever I'm having a bad day and I'm trying to turn it around... My friend Fanella Fielding died last month and I don't think there is ever going to be a day that goes by that she will not in my thoughts for one reason or another.



See you in two weeks!

What's In A Name... And 25 Other Things

Many people who left Europe and found their way to Hollywood through the 1930's were often persuaded by immigration officers, studio heads and often just plain common sense  to change their names to be more user friendly in lights on a marquee or in credits... Let's start with MGM... Samuel Goldwyn (the G in MGM) started his life in Poland as Schmuel Gelbfisz and on his arrival in the United States changed it to the literal americanized translation of his name to Samuel Goldfish... It really does not have the same ring to it if it were Metro Goldfish Mayer would it?

Here are some of the other notable name changes through Hollywood history...

Norma Jean Mortenson--- Marilyn Monroe

Thomas Cruise Mapother IV--- Tom Cruise

Allen Stewart Konigsberg--- Woody Allen

Marion Morrison--- John Wayne

Bernard Swhwartz--- Tony Curtis

Some people simply abbreviated or dropped part of the name...

Ethel Zimmerman--- Ethel Merman

Frederick Austerlitz--- Fred Astaire

Clinton Eastwood--- Clint Eastwood

James Baumgarner--- James Garner

Walter Matuschanskayasky--- Walter Matthau

Leo Jacoby--- Lee J Cobb

Catherine Jones added Zeta to her name before marrying Michael Delany Down Jr. (Michael Douglas) son of Issur Danielovitch (Kirk Douglas)

Mel Columcille Gerrard Gibson just dropped his middle names to become Mel Gibson...

Eldred Gregory Peck did the same thing... and Jennifer Anastassakis simply abbreviated to become Jennifer Aniston.

Hulk Hogan had second thoughts about the ring of Terry Jene Bollea and Virginia McMath thought Ginger Rogers had a little more kick....

Whoppi Goldberg--- Caryn Johnson

Rita Hayworth--- Margarita Cansino

Red Buttons--- Aaron Chwatt

Michael Caine--- Maurice Micklewhite

Lauren Bacall--- Betty Joan Perske

Judy Garland--- Frances Gumm

Joaquin Phoenix--- Joaquin Rafael Bottom (he might have been very popular in a gay bar)

James Dean--- Seth Ward

Edward G Robinson--- Emmanuel Goldenberg

Doris Day--- Doris von Kappelhoff

Demi Moore--- Dametria Gene Guynes

Bruce Willis--- Walter Willison

Cyd Charisse--- Tula Ellice Finklea

Ben Kingsley--- Krishana Banji

Anne Bancroft--- Anna-Maria Louisa Italiano (I mean really?!*)

and my absolute favorite that sounds like a made up Hollywood name Lucille LeSueur became Joan Crawford.

I think there was a time in the United States especially in Hollywood and now maybe everywhere when anything that sounds too Jewish or too ethnic or exotic or just too different just does not work as well to brand yourself with a positive public image  and the all important Q Ratings... what amazes me about this is when you consider that Donald Trump's name would actually be Donald Drumpf had it not been changed generations ago and yet with all this he is still so... well you know!

Although I'm not a big fan of the television show Dancing With The Stars... I was touched by the book "I'll Never Change My Name: An Immigrants Dream From The Ukraine To The USA To Dancing With The Stars" by Valentin Chmerkovskiy... I would never in a million years tell someone that they should change their name (Some of the most interesting people I know still have very interesting names)... but I once thought  early on that Jane Kaczmarek might have problems... obviously she did not encounter any that she could overcome... but someone once moving to Italy to model asked me and I said... "Italians can mangle almost any non-italian name and your name is not that easy to pronounce... my advice is change it to something a little more simple (and yet still you) will most likely make your working and maybe your social life in Milan a little easier"... he thanked me for the good advice after he came back but returned to using his family name because it meant so much to him... This whole name changing business  is a very personal thing and something that should not be taken lightly and deserves to be given a lot of thought and consideration ... my reason was mostly professional  but also because... I hated my name... and I think the psychological side effects of a disliked name are equal to living in a hated home... trust me I have experience with both.

OK I have a confession... one of my guilty pleasures are People  and Us magazine and I usually only indulge during air travel, doctors waiting rooms and hair and nail salons...  So... recently

So while I was waiting to get my flu shot I perused a few back issues of Us Weekly in the waiting room and in the exam room and learned a little bit about a few people because they have a feature called 25 Things You Don't Know About Me... so without further ado...

1. I hate texting I would rather talk to you in person but failing that I prefer hearing your voice on the telephone or on my voice mail...there are certain nuances to more direct communication.
2. I was a lifeguard for some of the water events at the 1984 LA Olympic games.
3. I'm always on time... I think it's disrespectful to the people you are meeting to keep them waiting.
4. I'm a neat freak... I think the world can be so chaotic at times that it's calming for me to have my life in order at home.
5. I'm a list maker... I have achieved most of my dreams and goals in life and it's helped me to make lists and jot down ideas  and to have a place to make a new plan when the old one needs reworking.
6. I love popcorn... I have it almost every day!
7. I'm an excellent driver... I have never gotten a ticket (except for parking)
8. I have worked as a stunt man in film and done some impressive  vocal doubling in music.
9. My favorite color is turquoise blue... my second favorite is aquamarine... yes there is a difference.
10. Downhill skiing is my favorite sport to participate in, followed by diving, surfing and tennis.
11. I used to be an excellent gymnast.

12. I would rather have a simple home that I could take care of easily myself than live in a mansion with servants.
13. I love to read and prefer actual books and news papers and magazines to downloading something on a device.
14. I love the way the dining room table looks after a magnificent meal and a few bottles of wine with good friends and a great conversation.
15. I would rather cook a fine meal at home than eat in a fancy restaurant.
16. If I have trouble sleeping I revisit a place in time that had some happy significance for me and relive the the experiences and conversations. (it's much better than dwelling on the negative past)
17. If you tell me a secret and tell me not to tell anyone I won't. (if you have been reading the whole time since I started this you already know that)
18. If I had to choose between a week in Las Vegas or a week at Martha's Vineyard... I pick Gay Head Beach on the southwest corner of the island.
19. I love card games... Bridge is my favorite but a good Gin Rummy game is always fun in a pinch.
20. Vanilla ice cream is my  favorite because I like to doll it up with things like marshmallow fluff, walnuts and maple syrup and salt.
21. I like going to movie or theatre matinees on a whim at the spur of the minute.
22. I consider  eight hours of sleep a necessity otherwise lack of sleep shows on my face and people think I'm either angry and/or sad.
23. I consider true love, real friendships and my health the most treasured accomplishments of my life.
24. I wish I had taken better care of my teeth.
25. I'm truly an optimist because no matter what has happened to me in the past and what is going on in the world right now I deep down believe that....

 Oh and BTW I also like pina coladas and walks in the rain and the feel of the ocean and the taste of Champagne!... See you in two weeks!

Capri

What can I say about Capri? ... except I always refer to it as The Isle of Capri; a habit I started when someone asked me sometime in the 1980's "Where did you get that fabulous bag?... I replied... "Oh this?... on the Isle of Capri!"... I wish I still had that bag but it was not designed to be around forever because it was a woven straw bag that I carried around the world until it fell apart. I wrote briefly about Capri here in La Dolce Vita It would be impossible for me to say I have a favorite or least favorite place in Italy as it would be like saying I have a favorite or least favorite chocolate dessert... I find them all  like places in Italy equally delicious... but Chocolate Angel Pie and Capri both hold a special place in my heart...

Sometimes when I have trouble sleeping or I'm stressed I close my eyes and visualize the views coming to Capri by boat or from the island to the water and everything in between. I said previously that I have no real first hand hotel experience because I have been lucky enough to stay in a private home for one reason or another... but I have had dinner at Grand Hotel Quisisana near the central Piazza Umberto I (the social center of the island)... it was an expensive meal but worth every lire (when I was there) what I remember best was the company and the conversation and an evening laced with candle light and fragranced with bougainvillaea, oleander and jasmine.

Capri is about six kilometers long and about two kilometers wide and has two towns Capri and high above Anacapri... on first visit I highly recommend taking the day tour and after that you will have an understanding to explore the island again and again on hopefully your many visits.

The south coast gets the most sun and is protected by sea winds from the high cliffs... so it's ideal for sun bathing often even in the winter... the little harbor area is Marina Piccola.

I have very few actual phobias but caves are close to the top of the list and even more extremely anxiety inducing are underwater caves but I made the exception to see the Blue Grotto... it's a massive flooded cave and the sunlight reflection makes the cave appear to be lit from the inside with a beautiful blue glow...

There are small boat tours that take you in an opening that is barely a meter high and if the water is particularly rough it's impossible to enter safely... on the other side of the island is the Green Grotto which is smaller but easier to navigate and less crowded.

You should also visit Giardini di Agusto (Gardens of Augustus)...Villa San Michele... there are few homes and gardens in the world this splendid... and Monte Solaro, from the Piazza Vittoria in Anacapri there is a 12 minute chair lift ride (or a one hour walk) that leads to the highest point on the island where you can see bay of Naples the Amalfi peninsula, the mountains of Calabria. In addition to taking a tour of the island I highly recommend taking a boat tour around the island... you won' be sorry the scenery from the water is the highlight to any visit to Capri.

Known as simply the Piazzetta is the town square in Capri that seems like a stage in a film under the clock tower ...

From here you find the cafes and shops that feature designers on Via Camrelle...

Elsewhere you will find shops selling souvenirs, flowers, locally made perfume, pottery, clothing and of course Capri's custom made sandals (made in a little over an hour)... and no matter what make sure you sample the Limoncello Di Capri (liquor made from Capri lemons) and savor a Neapolitan Pizza made with fresh locally made mozzarella cheese.

If you are staying in a hotel near the square make sure your room is not adjacent as it's rather loud and boisterous until late into the night and early morning... also most hotels on Capri are not child friendly so if you are planning on visiting as a family make sure  you book your hotel reservations carefully.

Getting to Capri is easiest from Naples as there are regular ferries from Calata di Massa and nearby high speed boats from Molo Beverello (this is also where the cruise ships dock) There is also ferry service from  Amalfi, Sorrento and Positano... getting to Capri is easy... the most difficult part of the journey for me has always been leaving... but taking with me my memories and experiences have always made me want to return again and again.

Join me again in two weeks!

Mishegoss And Mixed Signals

I hope everyone had a great summer I know I did... usually during my summer break I manage to put together a few of my future entries  but alas I just enjoyed myself and the season so I'm flying by the seat of my pants this week as we start out on my third year of this project... so it's going to be short and sweet.

Noun. 1. mishegoss - (Yiddish) craziness; senseless behavior or activity. meshugaas, mishegaas. foolery, tomfoolery, lunacy, craziness, folly, indulgence - foolish or senseless behavior.

I can think of no other single word that best sums up the current United States president and his administration...but I'll get back to this later... the word came to my mind as I was thinking about some of my own and others behavior  over the years--- on my part I've said before I used to tend to sugar coat things (sometimes heavily) to make people and situations seem better than they actually were; it was a coping mechanism  for me that started in childhood and I continued to use as a crutch up until about  nine years ago when I started seeing people and situations as they were rather than how I wanted them to be... don't get me wrong a little of this behavior can be quite helpful in a pinch it's helped me endure unpleasant professional and personal situations and people over the years and sometimes wishful thinking was actually the catalyst to helping to change and make things better.  The down side to all of this is that many times I did not say what was on my mind and subsequently carried some unspoken words and actions in my luggage in my journeys and they have bubbled over in anger and resentment a few times... I realized this summer that I can't go back and change the past simply by saying or doing now what I wanted to then... so I examined the issues  and wrote it all down including much of what I should have said and done and pondered mailing the prevalent thoughts to a  few key players from the past and decided to burn the paper and reduce it to ash and I took it down to the river and released it in the wind and hopefully let go of it forever... the memories of the people and situations I will never forget and in a few cases I have not been able to forgive a few people but I'm letting go of the resentment and anger and moving on... from all of this I've learned that if you have something you want to say to someone state your feelings now and don't let them stew for 20 years and if there is something you should do... do it now don't wait for any change,... but with all of this sometimes things that are difficult to say or do are best slept on for a night or two and should be written and choreographed with care and forethought... and finally I finally learned this summer that   tough times don't last...but tough people do... and doing the right thing will always lead you to the right place and people.

It's very important to see yourself, other people and situations and the world for what they are rather than what you want things or people to seem or be; or you are not adequately armed to reason, communicate and problem solve effectively. I realized that over the years I have sent mixed signals and not picked up on what people were trying to tell me usually because I was preoccupied with other issues or simply because I just did not see the forest for the trees in the mishegoss I had created in a false perfect situation or world; as a result of this I often misread or did not understand the signs and symbols other people or the world were giving me but I will say as a side note to this... whenever I'm working, auditioning or socializing  I always have my A game going on and put my best foot forward no matter what.

 As a simple example of misunderstanding and missed signals... when I was younger...

This is very typical of the type of signals I missed when I was young... luckily I matured and became more savvy and sophisticated and now more easily understand the subtleties life throws my way unless I'm being deliberately mislead which leads me back to my feeling about the current political climate in the United States.

Probably the biggest sacrifices I've personally had to make are I will never stay in another hotel owned by Steve Wynn or shop at Home Depot because of the millions of dollars  CEO Bernie Marcus gave to Donald Trumps campaign and inauguration... I don't intend to ever support Sheldon Adlson of Sands Entertainment, Robert Johnson and the NY Jets, Peter Thiel of PayPal or Isaac Perlmutter owner of Marvel Entertainment.... the list goes on and on; Linda Bean of LL Bean is never going to see a single dollar of my hard earned money or Harry & David, Men's Warehouse, Kohl's QVC or any of the products owned by Koch Brothers which include Angel Soft, Brawny, Dixi Cup, Quilted Northern and Sparkle. I won't stay at the Beverly Hills Hotel, shop at Urban Outfitters or eat at Chick-Fil-A...finally I'll be keeping the pillows that I have since Mike Lindell thinks Drubpf is the greatest president ever and he supports Laura Ingraham and is going after Planned Parenthood.  Luckily we have other and often better choices. There are midterm elections coming up in the US in November and what promises to be another contentious presidential elections in two years... If you want to make a difference learn everything you can about  who  you are voting for and where they stand on the issues and exactly how they are planning to enact progressive change but perhaps and maybe equally important know where the money comes from to finance their bid for office because they are contributing money that has strings attached... and keep this in mind...

And in terms of looking back on the good and the bad times sometimes it's difficult to see the differences between them and often you never can because with time the story that is written between the shadow and the act of yesterday and today they can become each other...See you in two weeks... I'll be writing about the Isle of Capri!

Hitting The Road

Although I prefer to fly to most destinations I've said previously that driving and getting a little dusty and sweaty on a road trip can be a very illuminating and liberating experience. My friend George and I have driven the entire Route 66 (in two different trips) and from it I learned quite a bit about the people and the world we live in and discovered a treasure trove of insights about friendship and who I am and what I'm capable of.

 Route 66 runs through six US states and although there are interstate highways available there is a certain charm of getting off the beaten path... and it takes a little longer but you have the opportunity to see and experience so much more than what is available on vast stretches of eight lane interstate routes... I only wish that cell phones and GPS navigation had been invented... but then again getting turned around or walking to a pay phone to call AAA for roadside assistance are both part of the memory of those trips.

One of the best pieces of advice I could possibly give you for this trip is do it during the summer when the weather is nice and there are more hours of daylight... and to make advanced reservations for lodging along the way... we sort of flew by the seat of our pants the first time and did not always get our first choice of motels (but in our defense there was also no internet in those days either)

So with the combination of the two trips it started in Chicago and ended in LA. and along the way we stopped to eat at Dell Rhea Chicken Basket in Willowbrook IL and it was one of the best baskets of fried chicken I've ever had...

One of the charms or nightmares of the time was that i-pods and satellite radio were non existent and you had to rely on finding radio frequencies along the way... sometimes there were none to be found... thus the importance of having a traveling companion you liked and had something interesting in common to discuss during the radio silence.... our first real stop was Carthage MO I was really interested to see the town because a friend of mine had relatives there and spent many summers visiting... I was charmed by the ambience and that there was a Drive-In theatre that we decided to pass on and instead get a good nights sleep and an early start the next morning.

Boots Court Carthage MO

We were pretty stocked with food and snacks and beverages so we cruised through Oklahoma except for a fuel stop and sang rousing renditions of OOOOk-lahoma, where the wind comes sweepin' down the plain during the periods of no tunes available on the radio... speaking of tunes most of the diners we stopped at for lunch and all the motel lounges had a juke box (a place with a juke box will always hold a special place in my heart)... and speaking of those charming roadside diners and corner cafes... there is likely to be a waitress with a name badge that says Dot (short for Dorthea) and she will likely say something to you like "more coffee hon?" make sure to say please and thank you because good manners and kindness will do more for you on the open  road of life than you may realize. One of our biggest requirements for lodging was a place with a pool since it was summer during both trips and one of the most memorable things was the intense heat on dark dessert highways.

On the trip that we had no  room reservations waiting for us at the end of the day we sometimes had to drive off the highway a few miles on dusty roads to find something... (The only place we called ahead and made a reservation was Santa Fe NM where I had a prior visits and experience) Finding a vacancy sign was like winning a prize...

We saw The Cadillac Ranch and stopped so we could feed and water ourselves in Texas

We stopped for The Petrified Forrest mostly because of the Bette Davis, Humphrey Bogart movie... we drove a couple of hours out of our way to take a peek at the Grand Canyon, it's really amazing and awe inspiring but if you ever have a chance to see it from the bottom at the Havasupai Indian Reservation I can't recommend that trip highly enough it's one of the most beautiful places I've ever visited... but that is a trip all by itself.

Along the way you can actually sleep in a Wig-Wam... we did not... but you can if you want...

The end of the second trip brought us to the Santa Monica Pier where I have before and since spent many wonderful hours but the memories of that that trip stick out most in my mind.

So with all this the sights and sounds of summer are calling my name and I'll be taking to the road and living on the Summer Side Of Life hopefully on Carefree Highway (I love Gordon Lighfoot's songs on road trips)... I'll be back in September. Have a fun summer!

A Stitch In Time

One of the best things about knowing how to sew is when you have nothing to wear and you can't find a single thing that you like and/or can afford you can simply make it yourself in the color and fabric of your choice and you have complete control over all the finishes and details.

When I was a child I was fascinated by the ability of others to cut out a pattern and fabric and put it all together and turn it into a sensational garment... and like many other things I was led to believe it was difficult and you needed to have some special magical talent to do it... but when I was a theatre major you had to have a technical focus and I choose costuming (it was a toss up between that and lighting)... I learned costume design and construction for the theatre from a master... but one of the most important things I can tell you is sewing something to wear to a party and something to wear for a party scene in a play are as different as night and day... I suppose the best way I can illustrate this is you have to consider that theatre lighting can have a  tremendous effect on the way something will look from the audience but probably most importantly things have to be made different for the stage especially if any rigorous activity (like dancing) is going to happen while wearing it. This is the primary reason most costumes have to be made for stage work rather than store bought. I remember hearing a story from someone once when 'West Side Story' was on broadway in order to cut down on expenses they replaced the jeans (when they wore out) with store bought... well they looked terrible because the originals were handmade and dyed for theatre lighting, but more importantly they were designed and constructed so the cast could dance in them... the store bought replacements had no give and were difficult to dance and move in.... look at this clip closely and see if you can spot the differences. (one hint is there are no working pockets in the pants)... and the fabric had some stretch to it and all the seams were sewn with elastic.

A few of the other important differences with theatrical and film costumes is that sometimes the hems are weighted with chain so that a costume will move just so and sometimes they are treated with something to make them shimmer in the lights and special care is taken that shirts and blouses stay tucked in... very often there are no buttons or zippers in case a character has to make a fast change... and in one instance when I had a part in a production it was reversible so I could get off on stage right and turn it inside out and return on stage left  a minute later as a different character in a large ensemble cast. Costumes for film often have greater attention to details because they are filmed and viewed more closely than from a theater audiences perspective.

But back to real life... I had a couple of life changing experiences that started in Bergdorf Goodman one afternoon.... I asked myself "When did everything become so ugly and expensive and made out of such dreadful material?"... so second part of this life changing revelation came when I was presented with a bill of $50.00 for some pretty minor alterations from a tailor.

Within a week or two I went out and bought a sewing machine and a book to help me get started. (I come from a mindset that you can teach yourself anything from reading the right book with the exception of flying a 747 and performing brain surgery.... well sewing proved to be the exception despite the wonderful tutorials on YouTube). I fiddled around at home and subsequently signed up to take sewing class at Mood (You may know of them if you watched Project Runway) They have locations in LA and NYC and I can't recommend them highly enough besides learning the basics in the beginning class I learned technique  in the intermediate and advanced class... but one the most important things I learned is like   playing any musical instrument or sport... the more you do it the better you get. The most important thing was that I had the confidence in myself to become better... but if truth be told I met three wonderful people who I plan on being friends with for the rest of my life... our teacher Ben... my separated at birth soul mate sister Debra and Stefano who recently finished a program at FIT in design.

So... if you want to sew... go out and get yourself a sewing machine and buy a book and some fabric and get your feet wet practicing... but I can't recommend classes highly enough. I took the intermediate class twice and the advanced class twice. I also took a workshop in tailoring and alterations... and advanced shirt construction class ( I have a made to fit shirt better than anything else in my closet)  and I took a class on how to use a serger. It's really important that you have good supplies (don't get me wrong the initial investment on all this is fairly steep but once you have it all you only need to buy patterns. buttons, zippers, finishes, fabric and thread and the occasional needle replacements)... keep in mind I found a brand new tailors ham in a thrift store for a fraction of the original price.

One of the best pieces of advice I was given when I was taking classes was to turn clothing inside out and examine how it's made and put together... whenever I'm stuck and I'm having a hard time figuring out the instructions that come with a pattern (some are more difficult to understand than others) I look at the inside of something and I'm usually able to figure it out.

In addition the the satisfaction you get from all of this is you get to have things that don't exist in exactly the same way anyplace else in the world... also I spent a couple of years looking for a pair of white summer pants.... I finally made them... I wanted to do a little dance when someone admired them and asked where I bought them.

One final thing... I have a book with a photo of a pair of Calvin Klein trousers from the 90's and I've just been over the moon about them since I actually owned a pair... I've wanted to try to remake them but  they have a pretty tricky  waist and what I thought might be a difficult pleat detail... two weeks ago I found a Calvin Klein Vogue pattern of the pants at Housing Works.... I can't wait to have them again.

So until next week... enjoy your life... the beautiful weather and don't take anyone or anything for granted especially yourself.