07 September, 2024

The Master Plan

 First and foremost... I can't believe it's been it's been nine years since I started this project... I want to thank each and every one of you who have shared this journey...and equally important I hope everyone had a marvelous summer!


I was really delighted to look at the statistics tools that blogger lets me track what is being read and in what parts of the world... for some reason this year  Always In Fashion has become much more global and the top two blogs still being read are...

Let's Talk About That Girl

and...  Journey To Greece

I don't really have much I can add to the That Girl segment except... I was once on The Phil Donahue Show many years ago when he did a segment about the male modeling industry... he was a very, nice man... I was sorry to read about his death.

As far as talking about Greece... I have much more to say and so maybe this year we will revisit.


I do this to a lot of people all the time...

As far as the followup on my kidney donation... I met with the surgeon this summer and I'm fine and dandy and so is the recipient. I have been cleared for most activities... I'm sorry I'll never ride motorcycles again but c'est la vie!... However I've decided I'm not giving up surfing and alpine skiing just yet... I'll be happy riding the smaller waves and shushing down the intermediate slopes... and no more running with the bulls in Pamplona... the doctor suggested I be more scrupulous and carefully consider my activity options... and deliberate over being a spectator for certain higher risk venues.. The one big surprise is The American Red Cross was doing a blood drive and would not let me donate with one kidney... I don't know why but... whatever.


The only photographic evidence of me surfing Waimaia...

I did not make it to the beach this summer... but that's OK I had plenty to keep me busy... I'm still working on my book (I've made great strides if I do say so myself)... and now that the kids are back in school I'll head over to the racquet club and start playing tennis a couple of times a week again.



I got an email from one of the senators in my district... offering round table meetings to seniors once a month to help navigate the journey of growing older... titled "A Master Plan For Seniors"... first of all I don't consider myself a senior... don't get me wrong, I love a discount as much as the next person... but I only noticed on a receipt recently a senior discount... I thought to myself that was awfully presumptuous on their part... but I digress... I looked at the e-mail a couple of times and thought how can there be a master class on aging?... but the next meeting was less than a five minute walk from where I live so I r.s.v.p.'d  and showed up for the meeting on the scheduled day... When I walked in several people looked at me with very hostile expressions and someone said "This is the senior meeting you must be in the wrong room" (I thought thank you for that because I'm am delighted I don't fit in here) but I said instead... "I'm here to take notes for someone else"...so what they covered at this session was...

  • Technology classes for seniors
  • SNAP and other public assistance programs
  • Medicare & Medicaid issues
  • Affordable senior living programs
  • Crisis Intervention
I did not stay for refreshments and one-on-one question and answer time with the different speakers but thanked them and left but out on the sidewalk took a deep breath and thanked my lucky stars I did not need any of that... and made a secret wish that I never would...  I am so grateful that programs like this exist for the people who need it.... the one thing I was left with was most everyone who was there seemed... besides quite old... very unhappy.... and I suspect the main reason was loneliness... I think illness, loneliness and financial insecurity  are the worst  aspects of getting older...I truly believe if you have so much pain or difficulty to cope with and no one to talk to about it that it will change you and your outlook on life forever... I wondered if these issues were addressed at other meetings... I had hoped that the "Master Class" would be about aging with dignity and the steps necessary... maybe for the people there this is what they wanted and needed.

Walking home I thought... 20 years from right now I would probably give anything to be the age I am now... exactly this healthy and living this moment... so I decided to take a moment to celebrate that exact moment (luckily I always keep a small bag of emergency confetti  for just such moments)... A lot of people who I thought would be around for this part of the ride have died or have just been written out of the story for one reason or another... and I thought about the people who are still playing leading and/or supporting or cameo roles in the last act... and I'm not taking any of them or any of the things we mean to each other for granted.

I've been at a crossroads with my professional endeavors for a few years as I've aged out of some... and AI is pushing me away from some of the other venues to the point that I'm really only working part-time... but I still enjoy vocal classes and auditions and call backs ... so that's why picked up the threads of my book outline and started writing with a renewed  passion and some new insight (It's a mystery-suspense novel... but I'm throwing in some of my own experiences and history to give it some life blood and spice) this all started with someone saying I should write a book about my life and experiences... I was not really wild about the idea... I'm still not... but I'll share part of it... I'm really doing it because...

  • It may generate some income... (I'm already thinking about the talkshow circuit and book signing tour)
  • It's helping me stay creative 
  • With the research it's building knowledge
  • My mindset is evolving

One of the things about growing up and growing older is that other people opinions about me or my life are mattering less and less... it all started when I was in college and I said "Oh my gosh what will people think if I did ___________?... and one of the smartest people in the world said something to the effect of...


Here is a room filled with all the people who pay your bills and walk in your shoes every day and will determine your future and care more deeply about you and your loved ones than you do...who cares what other people think... don't ever let anyone or their unsolicited opinions  discourage you again... and I never have.

If there is a master class on getting older... I'm just kind of winging it and improvising on a daily basis.

I've started with... "I am not what happened to me along the way... I am what I choose to become... I have to create my own world or die in someone else's"

That being said... every morning while I'm having my coffee I take out a notebook and read and some days write something new about the things I'm grateful for, or what I admire and respect in Nichols and the life we built together... and with each new choice I have or have to consider or reconsider each day... I ask... "Does this choice support the life I want?"... because all we get are time and choices... we need to be very wise with both...but you need to be willing to take risks and chances sometimes...


Choice is the most powerful tool we have...every choice we make opens an infinite number of opportunities or portals in the universe... at the same time it can close off an infinite number of possibilities or paths... at any point we can change the direction and the fabric and texture of our life with a simple choice.

So what's my master plan?... it's pretty simple...

and...

so it took me years to figure this all out but... there is no such thing as spare time, there is no such thing as free time, no such thing as down time. All you've got is Life time... spend it wisely. Please remember that you are totally replaceable at work...You are not replaceable at home... home is your real life.





We have Broadway theatre tickets next week to see Patti LuPone and Mia Farrow... maybe I'll write about that next I'm not sure... Oh and one more thing... if you are able to vote in the upcoming election in the US make sure you are registered... double check your registration... and make sure you vote... this year is probably the most important election of our lifetime.


Meanwhile...if you have a chance to help someone, be thankful for the opportunity... the circumstances are aligned for you to be in the perfect place at the perfect time to make a difference in someone's life.

Please join me again next month!

1 comment:

  1. Great read. Oh, the "senior" sneaks up on us faster than we realize - or want. All we can do is face it with grace and ton of gusto.
    We're headed to NYC at the end of Oct. and will have time to take in only one show. I'm leaning toward "The Roommate," the wife is leaning toward "The Outsiders." We shall see who wins.
    Safe travels!

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