I hope everyone had a wonderful holiday! The new year always seems to bestow new and auspicious beginnings... but with every new start often we have to discard or say goodbye to someone or something.
I used to be someone who was afraid of change... until I realized that often we outgrow people, jobs, houses and circumstances. I had to learn from signs and events that endings are new beginnings that gives us an opportunity for a new chance at something or the ability to rethink and redesign our life and the road we travel. I've said this here before in other installments that it's so important to be where you belong; whether it's where you live, and who you spend your time with either professionally or socially. Sometimes we have to forge our way to find the right place... but if it never feels comfortable or right then you need to either let go and move on or sometimes maybe it's best to go to plan B (and in some cases plan Z) to find the right people, places and things that best suit us.
I've also said... it's important not to settle... sometimes we have to stoop to conquer... but if you make a habit of settling you will do it all the way down the line from being in a career you despise because you were afraid to take a chance at what you really wanted to do... to being with the wrong spouse because you did not want to be alone. I'm really lucky because I waited for the right "one" and spent years and years knowing that when I met the right person I would know it immediately... and I did... and we recently celebrated 18 (mostly wonderful) years together... but making this relationship a success I had to learn that it was not always going to be perfect and there would be ups and downs... luckily there have been more high points than low... but together we leaned how to enjoy the sunshine during the good times and weather the storm during the bad.
I've made very vast and wide career choices and changes in my life... and in all of them I've only been fired once... and during the termination a flash came to me as someone was apologizing and I said "It's OK... I didn't belong here anyway!" and while I knew it all along I was biding my time doing something I did not really love with people I did not trust or respect or have anything much in common with... and it made picking myself up and walking out the door and moving on with the life I wanted so much easier. I think perhaps the most difficult thing is particularly in the world today where people and talent are expendable for the sake of the bottom line... especially when you have devoted time and energy and in the back of your mind thinking that this was where you would retire from because you had found your place... in this case I can only say that karma is trying to tell you there is a better place for you... and now you have been given the opportunity to find it. You should always keep in mind that a company and the way it conducts business is a direct reflection on the owners personality and moral character.
With all of this I have been thinking about the places I've been, the people I met along the way and the work I did and the fun I participated in... all of these things have given me a skill set and a viewpoint that has led me to the where I am now... and as I consider all of that I'm optimistically looking forward to the journey to the new places and people I'm supposed to find.
So in the end of this if you think about all the chances you have taken on other people, or jobs or anything for that matter and it did not work out... part of it is that it was not supposed to because you needed to take a chance on yourself first and take control of finding your place in the world... and that is how I stopped being afraid of change.
Happy 2019! See you in two weeks.
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